King Conny Wobble
A brief history
Within the Anglo Saxon chronicles there is an anonymous tale of King Conny Wobble. It says that during the reign of Edward the confessor (1042 to 1066) a man by the name of Conny Wobble entered the court seeking counsel with the king. He was granted this highest of honors on account of him bearing a "beautiful vessel" which he intended to give to the king. One version of the legend found in the Sloane manuscripts goes as far as to say it was the Holy Grail. Although brilliantly fantastical, this version however implausible adds some explanation to the possibility of a pauper being granted access to the king, Edward being amongst the most religious of men. Conny Wobble was able to convince the King to hand power over to him for a single day.
This story is widely believed to have been concocted by Godwin the Earl of Wessex in order to damage the reputation of the King. It is however clearly recorded in the manuscripts that Conny Wobble did indeed rule for a day. During his "reign" Conny Wobble allowed the subordinate classes to take revenge on there masters. The noble men were dressed in women's clothing, a piglet was instated on the kings throne, old shoes were burnt and a sweet alcoholic drink mixed with eggs was served whilst Conny Wobble read a "humorous sermon" Whether this actually happened is unlikely, but many historians believe that the feast of fools (or festival of the ass as it is also known), which is celebrated in rural France sometime between Christmas Eve New Year, is a folk remembrance of this event.
The earliest evidence of Conny Wobbles existence dates back to at least the Iron Age. A gold beaker inscribed with his name (etched in runes) was excavated in 1818 from an ancient burial mound near Bodmin Moor. The artifact shed new light on a local folk story, which tells of "a ghostly druid who offered all he came across a drink from his cup, that could never be emptied". After carbon dating, the cup was confirmed as being from the first century AD. Further tests found the beaker to have in it traces of egg and a sweet alcoholic drink, much akin to are modern day brandy. As well as proving the incredible accuracy of local folk memory, it is undeniable evidence of Conny Wobbles existence over 2000 years ago.
Up until the 15th century tales of King Conny Wobble seem to have been peculiar to the British Isles, however at some time in the beginning of that century he seems to have made the journey over the channel and down in to Italy. In the family records of the Visconti-Sforza, there is mention of "a man wandering through the terraces" with "the face of a child and the hunch back and beard of an old man". Evidently Conny Wobble caused something of a stir in the region and was at some point taken to the court of the Visconti-Sforza just as they took control of Milan in 1450.
In the court records it is stated that a man of great benevolence and wit arrived to "entertain" Franceso the 1st, he was initially treated with contempt but after Franceso drank from his "bottomless cup" Conny Wobble seems to have enjoyed a brief tender as court jester! There is some debate within the Tarot card community that Conny Wobble may have been the inspiration for the card number zero, which is represented by The Fool. Evidence to support this being that the tarot is widely believed to have been first created in that region at the same time. Until the new millennium the legend of King Conny Wobble had become a mere fairy tale. However, to the shock of the academic community he has re-emerged as fact! Thanks to the discovery of video evidence there can be no doubt that we are uncovering a new chapter in the King Conny Wobble mythology. Gabriel Charon who found them mysteriously deposited in his coal shed kindly handed over the videotapes in question to the British Museum. Experts at the British Museum have pieced together the videos and created "King Conny Wobble Productions" especially to distribute this remarkable footage.
Other references to Conny Wobble:
1. The most common reference to a "Conny Wobble" is as an Anglo-Irish drink, which consists of eggs and brandy whisked together. This drink is referred to in 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue as a Conny Wabble. Although there is almost no modern text referring it King Conny Wobble directly, it is undoubtedly the case that this drink is in fact named after him.
2. In Ned Ward's "The London Spy" a coniwobble is referred to on page 176, "yours is such a coniwobble of a critic that I know not what to make of him". Although this reference is also noted in The Dictionary of Slang and Unconventional English, no more elaboration is offered then that it is apparently part of Ned Wards list of "suckers", bizarrely no such list can be found in the book its self.
3. In the Dictionary of slang and unconventional English by Eric Partridge and Paul Beale there is reference to “connivering about” which is the act of "aimlessly wandering or pottering". This entry may shed some light on Ned Wards use of the term, "conniwobble of a critic” conni perhaps denoting the inability to get to the point of the matter. Many linguists believe that this is an old colloquialism derived from a folk memory of Conny Wobble him self. His aptitude for wandering aimlessly through the countryside perhaps giving rise to its usage.
4. The song "King Conny Wobble's parade" by Sir Ashleigh Grove is said to be a direct reference to King Conny Wobble, although the song its self was recorded nearly thirty years before Conny Wobbles re-mergence.
This story is widely believed to have been concocted by Godwin the Earl of Wessex in order to damage the reputation of the King. It is however clearly recorded in the manuscripts that Conny Wobble did indeed rule for a day. During his "reign" Conny Wobble allowed the subordinate classes to take revenge on there masters. The noble men were dressed in women's clothing, a piglet was instated on the kings throne, old shoes were burnt and a sweet alcoholic drink mixed with eggs was served whilst Conny Wobble read a "humorous sermon" Whether this actually happened is unlikely, but many historians believe that the feast of fools (or festival of the ass as it is also known), which is celebrated in rural France sometime between Christmas Eve New Year, is a folk remembrance of this event.
The earliest evidence of Conny Wobbles existence dates back to at least the Iron Age. A gold beaker inscribed with his name (etched in runes) was excavated in 1818 from an ancient burial mound near Bodmin Moor. The artifact shed new light on a local folk story, which tells of "a ghostly druid who offered all he came across a drink from his cup, that could never be emptied". After carbon dating, the cup was confirmed as being from the first century AD. Further tests found the beaker to have in it traces of egg and a sweet alcoholic drink, much akin to are modern day brandy. As well as proving the incredible accuracy of local folk memory, it is undeniable evidence of Conny Wobbles existence over 2000 years ago.
Up until the 15th century tales of King Conny Wobble seem to have been peculiar to the British Isles, however at some time in the beginning of that century he seems to have made the journey over the channel and down in to Italy. In the family records of the Visconti-Sforza, there is mention of "a man wandering through the terraces" with "the face of a child and the hunch back and beard of an old man". Evidently Conny Wobble caused something of a stir in the region and was at some point taken to the court of the Visconti-Sforza just as they took control of Milan in 1450.
In the court records it is stated that a man of great benevolence and wit arrived to "entertain" Franceso the 1st, he was initially treated with contempt but after Franceso drank from his "bottomless cup" Conny Wobble seems to have enjoyed a brief tender as court jester! There is some debate within the Tarot card community that Conny Wobble may have been the inspiration for the card number zero, which is represented by The Fool. Evidence to support this being that the tarot is widely believed to have been first created in that region at the same time. Until the new millennium the legend of King Conny Wobble had become a mere fairy tale. However, to the shock of the academic community he has re-emerged as fact! Thanks to the discovery of video evidence there can be no doubt that we are uncovering a new chapter in the King Conny Wobble mythology. Gabriel Charon who found them mysteriously deposited in his coal shed kindly handed over the videotapes in question to the British Museum. Experts at the British Museum have pieced together the videos and created "King Conny Wobble Productions" especially to distribute this remarkable footage.
Other references to Conny Wobble:
1. The most common reference to a "Conny Wobble" is as an Anglo-Irish drink, which consists of eggs and brandy whisked together. This drink is referred to in 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue as a Conny Wabble. Although there is almost no modern text referring it King Conny Wobble directly, it is undoubtedly the case that this drink is in fact named after him.
2. In Ned Ward's "The London Spy" a coniwobble is referred to on page 176, "yours is such a coniwobble of a critic that I know not what to make of him". Although this reference is also noted in The Dictionary of Slang and Unconventional English, no more elaboration is offered then that it is apparently part of Ned Wards list of "suckers", bizarrely no such list can be found in the book its self.
3. In the Dictionary of slang and unconventional English by Eric Partridge and Paul Beale there is reference to “connivering about” which is the act of "aimlessly wandering or pottering". This entry may shed some light on Ned Wards use of the term, "conniwobble of a critic” conni perhaps denoting the inability to get to the point of the matter. Many linguists believe that this is an old colloquialism derived from a folk memory of Conny Wobble him self. His aptitude for wandering aimlessly through the countryside perhaps giving rise to its usage.
4. The song "King Conny Wobble's parade" by Sir Ashleigh Grove is said to be a direct reference to King Conny Wobble, although the song its self was recorded nearly thirty years before Conny Wobbles re-mergence.